Get the Man You Want.

“Valentine is coming, where is your boyfriend?”

Social media has a profound ability to make matters comical yet very unnerving. You’ve probably seen the viral video by Kabusa Oriental Choir, a Nigerian choir that is relentless at producing, remaking, and remixing this question every year right before Valentine’s Day!

Their creativity, comical nature and dedication to this course aside, the question is dreading for any single woman during the month of love. Perhaps you made a Christmas request for Santa Claus to deliver you a man last Christmas, but for some reason, that gift fell off the sledge.

It being a new year, and with new year resolutions being echoed at every stance, you’ve decided to finally take matters into your hands. Here are 9 unique ways to get the man you want!

1. The Hanky Drop Tactic.

In the Victorian Era, it was socially unacceptable for men and women to intermingle freely. Therefore, if a woman fancied a man, she would ‘accidentally’ drop her handkerchief before him. If the man was more of a gentleman, he would pick it up and return it to her.

Victorian-era women were smart enough to read and observe the cues of men. If he picked her handkerchief, it would signify interest in pursuit. This would then lay the groundwork for a meaningful interaction. However, should the man decline the invite, the woman would tally off to the next potential suitor.

The ‘handkerchief drop’ is a subtle way of engaging with a man while allowing him to actively pursue you. It worked then, and it still does in modern dating. Therefore, if you like a guy, try the handkerchief drop and test the waters. If there is mutual interest, great; if not, off to the next!

2. Know your Worth.

“Know your worth!” Many relationship coaches and gurus swear by this statement. You will hear it in every podcast, in many videos, and audiobooks. But what does it really mean to know your worth?

Knowing your worth is believing you are loveable, knowing that you are worthy and deserving of love. It is a mindset of abundance and trust that there are plenty of fish in the proverbial sea. It is having faith that the man you like will pursue you. And like the Victorian Era woman, if he chooses not to, you scurry off to the next.

Adopting this mindset can get you any man you want. Numerous studies show that men can smell a woman’s desperation from a mile away. Please don’t let this be your fragrance! Always trust that you are loveable, and when the time comes, the man you need and require will come knocking.

3. Smile at him Broadly.

The easiest trick to get the man you want is to smile at him. Smile subtly and broadly. Men decode this to mean potential interest and invitation on your end. Also, research shows that men fear rejection and require lots of encouragement to make a move on a woman. Thus, a smile will get things rolling fast.

A smile is the gateway to the soul. It is the best accessory a woman can wear. So, show it off when hanging out with your friends at a bar or an event. And when you do spot a guy you like, smile subtly at him. The more you smile and make eye contact, the more convinced he becomes that you actually want to know him more.

4. Ovulation Fever.

Met men when you are ovulating. It sounds bizarre right? However, in 2007, psychologist Geoffrey Miller conducted the infamous lap-dancing study where he asked professional lap dancers to keep a track of their nightly earnings for two months. He discovered that, during their ovulation period, the exotic dancers made significantly more money than any other time of the month.

According to research on Medical News Today, men find women very attractive at ovulation. Perhaps it’s the subtle changes in the eyes, skin or how they smell. Maybe it’s nature’s funny way of ensuring human survival. Either way, the ovulation period is when a woman’s attractive quotient is at an all-time high.

Therefore, with a little push from nature, step into your ovulation period with confidence and sassiness. Own it and flaunt it! Maybe that’s all the extra spice you need to get that man!

5. Let your Femininity Shine.

To get the man you want, you have to put down the masculine armour and drape in your feminine energy. Thanks to social media trends, many people are now aware that human beings have an intricate balance between masculine and feminine energies. Masculine traits like assertiveness, aggressiveness and leadership help women conquer careers and businesses.

On the flip side, it is feminine traits like stillness, flexibility and empathy that help women nature and nurture. These traits are also what men find most intriguing about women. Being a woman is something that will force his attention towards you.

You can embody this by slowing down. Stop rushing through life. Adopt a ‘being in the moment’ mindset and savour it to the latter. Slow movements elude certainty and confidence. Also, be genuinely happy and let it show. Smile more, be playful and flirtatious. Feminine energy has a charm that is irresistible to most men.

6. Be Mysterious.

Mystery is alluring. People are drawn to it. It ignites inner curiosity and a need to unravel the pieces of the puzzle. Thus, a mysterious woman draws men to her like moths to a flame. You can get any man you want with a little dash of mystery.

Men and women operate by different rules. While women don’t like to play games and wear honesty, openness, and companionship on their sleeves, men enjoy the thrill of uncertainty. Like peeling an onion backwards, they love to uncover the layers. They live for it; after all, they are hunters, so let them.

Therefore, be mysterious. To be mysterious is to sit in your worth. Don’t try to prove that you are a good fit for him. Rather, let him show you why he is a perfect match for you. Also, be elusive. Don’t overextend yourself and make your life revolve around him. If he is the man for you, you will know through his actions and words.

7. Flirt.

Let’s say you are in a bar with your girlfriends, sipping some wine. Then, a cute guy approaches you and starts a conversation. He makes you laugh, and the topic is good. Now you are interested in him and would love to see where it goes. What do you do next? Flirt.

Flirting signifies that you are playful, free and mysterious. It can also speed things along, and within no time, you’ll have a man. Be careful not to do too much, though; you don’t want to send out the wrong signal.

The key to good flirting is to enjoy yourself. Don’t fake it. If you are not having a good time, he is probably not the ‘one’. Try talking to his ear as opposed to shouting over the loud music. Touch his hand or tap his forearm; it signifies that you feel safe with him. Dazingly stare into his eyes as he speaks or watch his lips move; it shows you are open to knowing him more intimately.

8. Get out of the house.

It is wishful thinking to want a man and then spend all your time in the house. It would be nice if God dropped him at your doorstep, but reality does not work like that. If you want a man, go out and meet a man.

Diversify your routine. Don’t just go to work or home and repeat for the day on, with no end. Figure out your hobbies and interests and pursue them. For instance, if you value health and fitness, join a running club or go to the gym. You can also attend a dance class. In the pursuit of your passions, you will find people who are like-minded and perhaps a potential date.

Additionally, if you want a man, go where they are. Depending on the calibre of the man you desire, position yourself to meet them. It could be in a sports club, a high-end hotel, a board room or a church. There are so many places where you can find the man that you want, and all you have to do is step out of your normal routine.

9. Wear Red Lipstick.

Red lipstick is bold and undeniably powerful. In many cultures around the world, it was used as a symbol of power and status. This can be traced back to ancient Egyptians, Mesopotamian royalty, and Chinese dynasties.

You don’t have to be a Taylor Swift fan to know that red lipstick is widely considered bold, feminine and assured. It is her signature look. Therefore, throw on a cute outfit and piece your make-up together with a red lippie.

Maybe it is the enhanced confidence it gives you or the sense of mystery it creates; either way, men find women wearing red lipstick more attractive. ♥